Are You A Spanker?
By CJ Mills on Nov 11, 2008 in blogging, parenting
Jade was in rare form last night. It actually was pretty funny - until she stopped listening to me alltogether. I gave her a few warnings, and then resorted to something I don’t do very often - spanking. I hate spanking her. I hate the fact that she becomes afraid of me for a brief moment in time. I’m pretty much a sucker and she knows it.
Curious to know if any other parent out there struggles, or had struggled with this same issue…
Adam | Nov 11, 2008 | Reply
ugh.. I become a spanker when it is the last resort. I hate the way I feel after I spank Madison.
I was spanked as a kid by my parents… So when I am on my last nerve thats when I revert to how I was disciplined.
We have tried a couple different things time out ect. And we did that on a consistent basis we saw a difference. But Karen would do it.. I wouldn’t.. we would flip flop back and forth things would just fall apart.
My suggestion (even to myself) is you both need to sit down and figure out a consistent way to discipline and then just stick to it. Easier said than done.. trust me I know.
Hope this helps.. but know that you guys are not in this alone.
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GregQualls | Nov 11, 2008 | Reply
Asa isn’t big enough to know what he is doing, but Shannon and I both agree on spanking. I can’t imagine what it must feel like to have to discipline my kid that way.
I was spanked as a kid (probably a little more than that at times), but I see it as a Biblical and Godly way to discipline kids. In the words of my wife, “There’s a reason that God didn’t put any vital organs in your butt.”
GregQualls´s last blog post…History in the making.
Brook Sarver | Nov 11, 2008 | Reply
I’m not a parent, yet. But, my mother has anger issues. One day she broke her hair brush over my backside because my younger brother and I were running around the house like wild men. I got the brush, he got the wooden spoon. Don’t ever use a brush or wooden spoon.
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bryan | Nov 12, 2008 | Reply
We do spank, but have not had to in a while. I think it may have worked. It is definitely the last resort with us. I do not like to spank, but sometimes it is necessary.
My mom used the wooden spoon, and I vaguely remember one being broken on my backside. My dad used the belt, I actually remember only getting that a handful of times.
I turned out okay, but I think it is probably better to provide the discipline with the bare hand and not a foreign object.
@ CJ how did the Daddy/Daughter date go? I had one of those with my oldest, but need to do it with my youngest, soon.
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Adam | Nov 12, 2008 | Reply
I agree with Greg that spanking can be an effective discipline tool and as Bryan said used as the last resort. However you need to make sure that the spanking is coming from the right place.. Meaning it shouldn’t be the way you are releasing your anger/frustration on your child.
This was a great topic CJ.
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tam | Nov 13, 2008 | Reply
there is a big difference between being afraid of a parent and fearing the parent. i know my kids, when they were at that spanking age, had a healthy fear & respect of our right to, and action in, discipline. but it was a healthy fear, and it wasnt so much about us as much as it was about the consequences.
i heard once the difference between discipline and abuse is… abuse comes without warning where discipline is a process of chances, warning and firm correction demonstrated and motivated always from love.
so yes, we spanked our kids.
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CJ Mills | Nov 15, 2008 | Reply
tam - great distinction there.